= LifE Of a GaL =

Hi. Today is a most depressing day. Yesterday i spent like 2-3 hours settling SJ stuff, and in the end I didn't study for my Physics Lect Test. Just studied some formulae and stuff. Of course I guess i failed the test today, if I ever got like 10, I would be happy enough. But judging from my standard, I guess not.

Then I started doing my econs TYS, it was so discouraging that I don't even know hoe to do half the questions. I feel so stupid. I was just guessing my whole way through everything.

Then come math, I was like lagging behind by half the tutorial again. And I was like trying to figure out how to do the 4th question, the teacher obviously knew I wasn't paying attention to him, so he called me answer a question. I was totally like at a loss, cos' I don't even know what the question is about. It was such a siple question, and I took so long to answer it. I really feel like an idiot.

It was like I failed at everything I did. I didn't complete my Sec 1 Comp OS, didn't check my handover reports, haven't started collating my CPBS profile for each person, haven't done my nominal roll, my BLS nominal roll, haven't taught my admins and cpbs officer what to do. And I can't manage my time, with comp train, with 35th song leader post, with 35th climax figure, with SMC 4, with CPBS, with school, with FAU, with first aid duties.... I am really very very tired of trying to catch up with my schoolwork, tired of trying to organise my schedule to fit SJ, fit remedials, fit comp trains, fit FAU....

I feel like such a failure... Why do I fail at everything that I've done? I don't know... All I wanted was a rich and fulfilling life, at least do well in a few subjects, enjoy my days with much free space for me to work, for me to study.

Live With A Positive Attitude.... Perhaps that's what I should really do now...perhaps I should start thinking of how I should study so that it's okie, so that I can fit in the stuff that I want to do, whether is it SJ, whether is it reading, watching tv... I am tired now, I should go sleep and forget this all, and start afresh.